Most towns have at least one; a busy main road that allows traffic in one direction only, a one way street. The beauty of a one-way street is that you don’t have to be on the look out for upcoming traffic, everyone is heading the same way.

It was peak hour and the traffic was flowing steadily down Shirley Street when out of nowhere appeared the flashing blue lights of a police vehicle with blaring sirens to match. In quick pursuit was a dignified looking black car and on its tail was another noisy police vehicle. What was more astonishing was the fact that they were going against the flow of traffic on this one-way street. I gathered from other bystanders that the Prime minister was on his way to a function for which he may have been late. What a Privilege! Without his outriders this could have proven to be an extremely dangerous situation, for at that speed the chances of a fatal head-on collision was great. Also without his escorts, this attempt to save time may have been futile, as he would most defiantly attract the attention of a ticket cop.

As I waited, my imagination transported me momentarily to a life studded with the conveniences of being a privileged citizen. My fantasy world lasted only a few moments as I was quickly escorted back to reality by the blaring horns of frustrated common citizens perplexed by the slowing traffic on this once again, one-way street.

For many of us the New Year hands us what looks like a one-way street: the only convenient way to go is with the flow of the traffic. You may think, making changes will only insight head on collisions with others who prefer your former style. Also you may conclude that it will take significant adjustments and delays to do things in a NEW way. These anxious feelings are natural but not accurate. I have good news for you: you wont have to do it alone. You are guaranteed outriders who will go before and behind you to make your path safe. The Psalmist records in Psalm 85: 13

Righteousness goes before him
and prepares the way for his steps.

It can be frightening to turn your back on the way you have grown accustomed to doing things like

• rushing through the day without worship or
• eating for pleasure and not for health or
• reading for entertainment and not for knowledge or
• sharing for convenience and not for compassion or
• praying out of necessity and not for love

But with God as your guide you can safely go against the flow. He promises in Psalm 37: 23, 24

The LORD makes firm the steps
of the one who delights in him;
though he may stumble, he will not fall,
for the LORD upholds him with his hand.

You are a privileged citizen, a child of the king and He has decreed:

“Forget about what’s happened;
don’t keep going over old history.
Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new.
It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it? (Isa. 43; 18, 19 MSG)

So embrace this New Year with confidence and live at full speed, knowing that in God’s strength you will successfully accomplish God’s will for your life even if it means going against the flow.

ÓCopyright Patrice Williams-Gordon 2011

I have often time felt cheated of the elements that make me different form others. Those non-tangibles that seem to struggle for a face in the definition of who I am. The emancipating yet inhibited sway of my hips to the reggae beat, the clinging but suppressed warmth of oneness I feel with cultural icons, the the clarity of expression I struggle to contain emerging from my delicious dialect, patois! These and more leave me all but mourning the slow and deliberate death of a part of me, My cultural Identity. Read on as I respectfully chide my church for the role they play in this demise, then tell me what your thoughts are.

The Christian Assassination of Culture

The Caribbean is easily recognizable by its intensely colorful costumes, pulsating and intoxicating rhythms, vivid and compelling dialects, engaging and exciting social activities. Isn’t it disappointing that all this vim and vivacity dissipates as one transitions to the religious sector of the same people? Why should the stimulation of cultural actualization give way to swamping guilt brought on by of spiritual awareness? This is the emotional colic often experienced by Christians who have savored the refreshing sense of wholeness that accompanies finding authentic expression in his bequeathed heritage, only to be chastised by those who think it an antagonistic relationship with true spirituality. Church leaders, parents and church- school administrators must clearly understand that the passive undermining of one’s national culture, nurtures a generation of social retards and  offers an unfair ultimatum: to be a Christian or to be cultural. It is my conviction that until we embrace the cultural reality of our existence we will never be whole and our incompleteness will cripple the advancement of the church’s mission.

The position of the church has been traditionally substantiated by points such as:

1. We are expected to be ‘in the world but not of the world’; of such we must not be flavored by anything associated with the world including cultural expressions. Any union of the secular and spiritual is considered a deadly compromise.
2. Prevention is better than cure; therefore it is better to avoid any involvement and remain pure than to allow innocent forms and eventually lose control.
3. The proponents of our cultural forms are not spiritually inspired and as such, have a hidden agenda to promote ungodliness.

Though these positions have held sway for decades there is evidence that they are giving way to new positions. In a recently published article, the Anglican Church in Jamaica defends its plans to include reggae hymns, including lyrics from renowned singers Bob Marley and Peter Tosh, in its hymnal. It is of paramount importance that the vanguards of spiritual interest revisit their stance of absolute separation of church and culture or the pending revolution could result in a self-fulfilling prophesy.

Culture refers to the customs, practices, languages, values and world views that define social groups such as those based on nationality, ethnicity, region or common interests. It is a tool for personalizing and identifying with the larger world. When a Christian is stripped of his cultural identity he his forced to endure a borrowed religious experience and be judged by references and standards that are foreign to him.

The distancing of the church from cultural expression is most often passive and therefore not considered intentionally destructive. This however does not reduce the causalities. Passive undermining has several faces. When a church refrains from celebrating the culture of its people it is synonymous to denouncing it. By the same token, to not accept is to reject and to trade for something new is to devalue what you previously owned.

Cultural identity is important for people’s sense of self and how they relate to others. When a Trinidadian church refuses to allow the playing of the steel pans in its services but allows the use of the violin, isn’t that a strong message that the music originating from the Trinidadian’s soul is inferior, or worst yet sinful, when compared to that of the classical European?

When the dialect of the Jamaican Christian must be replaced in worship by the foreign, archaic strains of formal old English rhetoric, does it not send a strong message of inferiority and a sense of cultural preference from the perspective of God?

My understanding of the biblical Christian experiences suggests that as the Christian develops in the spiritual practice it is expected that the facades are peeled away and an authentic self eventually emerges. If, however, the individual feels pressured to repress parts of his true being (including the cultural context of expressions), one can only expect diminishing self esteem, frustration and ultimately unsatisfactory compromises. It may be reasonable then to propose that the rate of attrition in our churches may very well be tied to people in search of a spirituality which allows them to unite their authentic, culturally liberated souls to their spiritual convictions.

The Hebrew nation showed no distinction between its secular and religious practices; theirs was a holistic expression. The biblical account of the Christianity, respectfully recognized and fêted the culture of the people as they commemorated holidays and practices that marked their identity. It is as we seek to create a dichotomy that we precipitate a secular culture void of Christian principles. As it now stands, the decline in moral principles of the secular world is largely caused by the alienation of the church from cultural and civic issues. Rather than condemning the cultural expressions of the secular world the church must urgently acknowledge and celebrate the relevance to the holistic expression of its members. When done correctly, the ongoing transformation of cultural expressions will be flavored by the philosophies and graces of the Christian lifestyle.

With grace, dignity and moderation, the integration of cultural expression into the regular flow of Christian activities and traditions will promote a genuine experience that will be both rewarding and stimulating to member, church and country. After all, it is possible to be both cultural and Christian.

Works Cited

“Cultural Identity.” Social Report. 2009. [(Online]. Available: http://www.socialreport.msd.govt.nz/cultural-identity/. Retrieved April 8, 2010

“Jamaica Church defends reggae hymns.”[Online].  Available: http://guyanafriends.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/…/m/20310577141. Retrieved April 8, 2010

Before the Wedding Day!

By Khamille Moss

Soft lights, soft music, friends and loved ones all gathered together. The mood of excitement and anticipation builds swiftly as the time draws near. The handsome groom walks in with pride and confidence. Looking his ever best. He awaits the entrance of the woman of his dreams. The gorgeous bride walks in slowly nervous and excited. She can feel the love of everyone that surrounds her but is focused only on the man that awaits her.

The ceremony is beautiful and filled with love as they exchange rings and say the, I do’s. The photo’s are lovely and show them in all there beauty. The reception is romantic and filled with so much joy as they dance and hold each other closely.

“I hate it when you do that!”, the beautiful bride screams…”I hate it when you say that”, the handsome groom says…The day after the wedding.

The beautiful bride realizes that her handsome husband does not know where to find the dirty-clothes-basket, the day after the wedding.

The handsome groom realizes that his beautiful wife’s version of cooking is the nearest Wendy’s or Chinese restaurant, the day after the wedding.

This situation quickly turns into reality for some newlyweds. They get caught up in the excitement of the wedding day not realizing that the marriage begins the day after the wedding.

In all of the excitement of planning how many guests, what type of dress, and how big the diamond will be, they forget to ask, what type of person am I marrying? What type of family am I marrying into? Does my partner love God? Can my partner provide for me?

Ladies, think about it. We like quality time, so you should know before the wedding when he comes home, is he more concerned about dinner on the table or how did your day go?

Guys, think about it. You don’t really like to be bothered, so you should know when she comes home is she more concerned about knowing where you were all day and why you didn’t call or giving you a few minutes just to relax?

As simple as these ideas may sound this is just a taste of what married couples find out about their spouse after the I do’s.

The lady that loves to shop never found out if her new handsome husband makes enough money for her to spend. The guy that loves sports never found out that his beautiful wife prefers to talk thru the entire game.

The lady who is always gorgeous and always well put together never found out if her handsome husband would paint her toe nails while she is pregnant with his third child.

The guy that carried the body of a greek god never found out that his wife would no longer be attracted to him once that body turned into the exact replica of buddha.

Till death do us part, For richer or for poorer, In sickness and in health, To love and to cherish. After the wedding day is one day to late to find out what these words mean to your partner.

After the wedding day, is a day too late to find out that he doesn’t pay the bills on time and she asks too many questions.

After the wedding day, is one day too late to find out that infatuation is not the same as love.

Take time, spend time, ask questions, and be observant. Get to know who you marry before the wedding day.

This Thing Called Love

by David L. Pryce

On the verge of getting married, I was having pre wedding jitters. For years I had read books, watched movies and listened intently to presentations based on love, being in love and how love feels. Many have tried to open the human eye to this; still I am not even sure what to call it. Is it an emotion, a feeling, a principle, an act, a process or is it all of these all wrapped in one big package.

Feeling a bit lost and confused as you might be at this point in time, I turned to some people I was sure were in love. The first discussion was with a male friend of mine who was still “in love” with his high school sweetheart and they were doing pretty well. Running the risk of looking like a fool as we strolled down the road one day I asked in a low, candid voice. “How do you know when you are in love with someone”? To my surprise he replied without hesitation, “When all you can think about is making the other person happy, when you no longer care about what is best for you but what is best for her and all she thinks about is what is best for you”. I was happy because I had previously made up my mind that the happiness of my- wife- to- be would always come before mine. However I couldn’t help thinking “Was it really that simple? Was that the answer that had eluded so many great philosophers for ages?

Thinking there must be more to it than that, I set out for a source that had given me many answers in the past, my Bible. Like any bright scholar, I turned to the index looked up love and read as much as I could on the topic.  Then I went o the internet and encyclopedias to try and get a deeper understanding of what the verses I had found in the Bible were saying. Somehow the answer I was searching for kept eluding me, so I went to my spiritual advisor, one whom I thought had experience from both a spiritual and social stand point as he himself was married. As we talked he would toss Bible texts into the conversation, asking how I felt about them and their explanation of love. That’s when I came upon it. There it was in plain sight, explained by the One who was an expert on the topic. John 15:13 -”Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends”. Jesus had taught us exactly how to love and in such simple language; no philosophical mumbo jumbo just plain and simple, -giving all for those whom you love. Indeed, where is there greater sacrifice than the giving of one’s self for another? I couldn’t believe it, it was now all so clear! It was exactly what my friend before had said and so much more.  .

As the words permeated into my soul I couldn’t help but wonder about all the individuals whom I had told in the past, “I love You!”. Really, how many of them would I have been willing to lay down my life for? The brutally honest answer makes me embarrassed even as I write. For years I have used these words so callously, not knowing the great onus that it carried. Now, after every utterance of the word love, I ask myself, “Would you really die for that person, or that thing that you claim to love?”

Jesus in the previous verse asked that we love each other as he has loved us, with the same sacrificial love that led Him to give his life for us. So too he wants us to love each other.  Today as you go through life let not your love be of the superficial type offered by the world but the genuine type, like that offered to us through Christ Jesus and coined so beautifully in John 15:13.

Be reminded that true love means willing to give your all.

Copyright ©David L. Pryce. September 2010

Have you ever received a gift you wished you could return? Dictionary.com defines a gift as

something bestowed or acquired without any particular effort by the recipient or without its being earned

Life sometimes hands us gifts and unfortunately, we cannot return them. What do you do when in the middle of living you are handed a gift that seems to say stop to all your dreams and goals? Or a gift that renders you crippled to enjoy the other gifts you previously had? Recently I had the pleasure of listening to an engaging presentation on how one unsuspecting recipient of life’s gift chose to embrace a gift that the average person would resent. Do be changed as you read her thoughts then chose to live Deliberately.

THE LONG GOODBYE

Fernella Finlayson

he first signs that something was amiss was probably 8 years ago

when I realized that a question I had only just answered within the last ten minutes was being asked again, and the reaction to the answer was the same.  At the time, I thought it funny and laughed.  However within the next 12 months I relived that moment more frequently and it became less and less humourous.

A  disease that is irreversible, progressive and slowly destroys memory and thinking skills, and eventually even the ability to carry out the simplest tasks. This is Alzheimer’s.  It is recorded, that symptoms may first appear after age 60.

Alzheimer’s disease is the most common cause of dementia among older people. Dementia is the loss of cognitive functioning-thinking, remembering, and reasoning-to such an extent that it interferes with a person’s daily life and activities. Estimates vary, but experts suggest that as many as 5.1 million Americans may have Alzheimer’s.   Unfortunately, here in the Bahamas, we do not have a system that affords us the opportunity to document our ills.

hen you have become accustomed to characteristics such as strength, perserverance, ethics and good old friendly disposition in a person, to experience almost the opposite of those, can be unnerving and even frightening at times.

The challenge of caring for someone with Alzheimers is also, for persons never before exposed, a jolting learning experience.  Patience and lots of it is a necessary requirement, coupled with understanding and the ability to not internalize negative things that may be said or done from the alzheimers victim.

My mother, of whom I spoke earlier lives with this disease every day.  Her children, my siblings and I, have been forced to learn and educate ourselves as much as possible about its effects both physical and psychological, it has not been easy.  There are seven stages ranging from mild to moderate to severe.  I refer to my mother sometimes as Jeckyll and Hyde because she can be her calm, sweet self and in the matter of a few minutes become agitated and upset about something trivial and minor.  After having an intimate knowledge of this disease for the past few years, I am better able to manage my time with my mother.

elieve me there have been some very challenging times, like when she was struck by a car and had to be hospitalized but we have also had our share of gut wrenching laughs, like the time she soaked my brother with a bucket of cold water because he was annoying her.

Persons who may be at a higher risk factor of contracting Alzheimers are those aged 60 and over, persons who have a family history of Alzheimers or in some studies, it was found that it was hereditary.

This is a scary thought and one I think about often especially anytime I can’t remember something.  I have even begun drinking coffee, something I do not particularly enjoy, after reading that it slows the onset of this vicious disease for persons who may be pre-disposed to it.  For family members living with Alzheimers victims, it can sometimes feel like a long good-bye because even though they are present physically, they sometimes are no longer connected to what made their relationship with you, unique and special.

It is important to cherish each day and verbalize feelings.  Show in action those who are important to you that they are and if you are faced with the challenge of Alzheimers, the goodbye may be just a little bit more bearable.

Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Eccl 4:11-12 (NIV)

Socks, fleece pants, two shirts, a jacket, a scarf and a hat and I was still cold. Can you guess my location? Before your mind takes the trip far north, let me tell you, in my house in Nassau Bahamas. With no central heat or insulated walls the cold air seemed to blow through the concrete walls. By all standards, it was cold. I knew I had every right to complain; after all this is the Caribbean where we boast twelve months of summer with a few off days allowing us to make a winter fashion statement. I complained to anyone who would lend an ear and passed the morning wrapped in my comforter.

Though the weather had changed most other things remained the same. There were dirty dishes in the sink, laundry to be done, floors to be swept and a hungry family who would be home in a few hours. Reluctantly I peeled myself from the covers and begun my chores, all the time complaining to myself of how cold it was. Then a strange thing happened, I became comfortable to the point of singing a tune, then a little uncomfortable, then very uncomfortable. First the scarf went then the jacket and finally the hat. Had the temperature suddenly increased? No it had not, I was generating my own heat and suddenly life was more beautiful.

Isn’t this true for many other areas of our life? We have justifiable reasons to complain that relationships or working conditions have become cold and we sit in a corner and shiver away. So many spouses lose the luster of a romantic marriage and resent the sudden chill in their relationship when they consider past times. Church members grumble and complain of the lack of love and fellowship in their congregation and the boring predictable programs that they must endure. Employees dread going to their loathsome jobs that once held much excitement challenge, and fulfillment. Our requirements for what we deem a normal life seem to be unfairly compromised by unreasonable people and or unfair circumstances. As we focus on our own needs we grow cold and dissatisfied; we shiver from the frigid results of less than ideal conditions If the truth be told, the complaints are very often legitimate but do they have to be permanent?

Take my challenge today, shake off that comforter of complacency and jump into action. Look around at the things to be done and start working. Focus on the change you so passionately long for and be that agent of change. In no time your shivers will give way to a revived spirit and you may even break a sweat. I have learnt that as we become consumed by the urgency of the job that lies around us, with time, our core temperature will inevitably increase. Today you may shiver but with a change of focus you will soon break a sweat.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Col 3:23-24 (NIV)

© copyright Patrice Williams-Gordon 2010

Finding Life’s Balance

Today life beckons to me with greater urgency than it did yesterday

An unquenchable desire to see with my eyes

then with my mind the crutches that usurps ordinary living

I yearn to hear with my ears then

with my intuition the sounds of truth,

gut wrenching truth, that each soul emits so often silently

I feel hurried to embrace my experiences,

the opportunities and challenges alike,

and squeeze it so hard till I, not them , change shape

For Life has intoxicated me with the aroma of authenticity

till I can no longer be satisfied with being the me you created in your dreams

Love has given me wings that make me sore above betrayal,

misrepresentation and public opinions

to heights of acceptance, belonging and confidence even when I stand alone.

I am blessed with parents who scrutinize yet applaud me

Siblings who interrogate yet support me

A lover how surrounds me yet frees me

Kids who inspect yet enthrall me

Friends who question yet trust me

A God who Judges yet strengthens me

My greatest need then is wisdom to find that balance that will keep it all turning,

to the steady rhythm of my purpose the cadence of my created mission

never insyncopated by excess of the bad or dearth of the good.

Today Life beacons to me with greater urgency than it did yesterday

Today I sprint to embrace life, squeezing it with all I have.

©Copyright Patrice Williams-Gordon 2009

]]> http://deliberatelivingnow.com/weblog/?feed=rss2&p=122 http://deliberatelivingnow.com/weblog/?p=106 http://deliberatelivingnow.com/weblog/?p=106#comments Sun, 18 Oct 2009 13:11:46 +0000 Patrice http://deliberatelivingnow.com/weblog/?p=106

Since you have been chosen by God who has given you this new kind of life, and because of his deep love and concern for you, you should practice tenderhearted mercy and kindness to others. Col 3:12 TLB

He brought fun and laughter to my two girls as they anticipated the almost predictable response of unsuspecting passengers in our car. Alphanso, a small red-bodied, blue-legged, beady eyed, rubber frog was positioned in the left hand corner of the dashboard in our right-hand-drive car. The passenger front seat became the stage for the latest drama. Who would be next to scream and attempt a hasty exit from the moving car as they caught sight of Alphanso?

The girls’ fascination with frogs seemed to be rewarded by a beige, medium size, real live frog who seemed to have signed a lease for the outer ledge of our front room window. At dusk each evening they would both pay Felix, a visit, albeit from the safety of the porch, calling to him from a distance. He was deemed sacred; no one was allowed to disturb him.

This morning however a chilling scream was heard in our front yard and my investigations revealed that Ashli had darted from the car at high speed dashing across the road in record time. A tiny real frog perched on the door jamb of Uncle Tim’s car was her source of terror. This is incredible! “But Ashli,” I asked later that evening, “Don’t you like frogs?” With eyes wide as saucers and very animated she replied….. “Yes Mummy, but from a distance.” “Strange love”, I thought.

This seems to mirror our response to many issues of life. As Christians we seem to exhibit such care and empathy to suffering and disaster in far way lands. Our hearts burn with concern and we are so moved with compassion for those in faraway lands whose basic needs go unmet. We pain for those locked away in prisons who need someone to read the bible for them. We are deeply concerned for those who yearn for a tender touch and a listening ear having been ravished by the effects of addiction.

This response is commendable and needful but how strange that we eagerly support pleas for help in remote places yet the reality of our own neighbor seems to scare us into inactivity. Do you know there is someone in your office who doesn’t understand the love of God for him? Can you believe that in your community are people dying of aids who have been shunned by family and friends? Are you oblivious to the fact that in your church is a family who daily struggles to find a meal? Do you know that maybe in your home is a child or a spouse yearning to be held for no other reason but love? Does it surprise you that deep inside your own heart is a longing that can be filled by quality time and bible study.

Sometimes it’s easy to love from a distance. Take the challenge and love someone up close today.

©copyright Patrice Williams-Gordon 2009

Sunrise in South Andros

…For it’s not where we worship that counts, but how we worship-is our worship spiritual and real? Do we have the Holy Spirit’s help? For God is Spirit, and we must have his help to worship as we should. The Father wants this kind of worship from us. John 4:21 TLB

I sat alone on a strangely twisted drift wood watching for the sun to rise on the beautiful beach in South Andros, Bahamas. It was a still morning except for the foaming yet gentle tide and few splashing waves. The coconut trees stood stately in the background and all birds were out of site. No wind rustled the bank grass and the crickets no longer chirped. The only thing that moved was an anxious crab which quickly hustled out its hole and back in as if expecting something to happen soon. Armed with my camera I was determined to capture the majesty of the sun’s arrival. The slither of a ray of light progressively got larger and larger slowly transforming a dark grey cover into a beautiful blue canopy. I waited transfixed with only the move of a finger to take each picture.  Just when it seemed as if the sun was about to make her grand entrance my camera read,  “No Memory”. This must be a mistake! But there was no time to solve this mystery, no time to take my eyes off the unfolding grandeur. One glance away and I would have lost it all. I place my camera down and absorbed the braking of a new day with every sensory neuron I could summon. My eyes saw shades of color and light dancing across the sky. My ears resonated the subtle applause of the ocean. My nostrils sieved the hint of salt and freshness in the morning air. My heart raced with excitement of the unaided breaking of a new day. Left stranded by my camera I was left to captured it all with my memory and what an experience!

So often, sophistication, the trappings of technology and plain routine, deprive us of the most profound experiences of life. One such possibility is worship. A true worship experience will not be determined by the eloquence of the speaker, the talent of the writer, the quality of your audio system, the melody of the musicians, the comfort of your easy chair or the tranquility of your space. The value of your encounter resides in your decision to feel the SON, Jesus, in every portion of your worship. Sing each hymn as if it were written from your very own experience; read each verse of scripture knowing that the Lord is speaking directly to your situation. Let nothing or no one share the attention you give to each point rendered, participating emotionally, as if this were your personal sacrifice to a Holy God. Be enthralled by the breaking of God’s love anew in your life each moment you spend in worship.

Finally, when it comes time to close the encounter, (and I know you will not want to) pause for a moment of silent prayer, thanking God for this unforgettable experience, then take the presence of God with you, throughout the rest of the day. I guarantee, you will be anxious to do this all over again, all because you decided to worship at a new level; after all God deserves our very best. What an awesome experience.

©copyright Patrice Williams-Gordon 2009